I can laugh about it now
because the darker side of staying friends
is that it never ends,
when you and I never began.

I could pour another drink
Touch the cup to my lips.
The timing's always wrong
and then you're gone
and I'm still alone.

I could crumble into dust;
turn to rust and fall apart.
I could disappear completely
and you'd never even miss me.
No you'd never even seen me leaving.

I had a plan:
I wanted to kiss you on the mouth
back then,
but you disappeared
and God knows I did, too.

Did I really make them???

Happy birthday to me,
I'm a grown up now,
who still sleeps with the light on!

Remember!
The very umbrella that protect us from rain,
can also be the parasol that keeps us in the shade,
even when the sun is shining...

Guess who just ordered a oneway ticket to Istanbul...
Sweet me!

Too much is too nebulous.
Too many of my plans depend on the possible outcome of too many processes.
I need more security, stability, certainty and strength.
Can I have it?

I guess it was just a small back coming depresion!

I'm not happy
being back
I'm not alive in here!
I go crazy in here...
I'm tired of restrictions...
I'm tired of boundaries...
I'm tired of waiting...
I'm tired of this place...
I'm tired of people who cant make up their mind...
I'm tired of being scared of being depressed...
I'm tired of doing things I dont wanna do...
I'm tired of thinking with my heart...
I'm tired of worries...
I'm tired of not knowing...
I'm tired of love without meaning...
I'm tired of loving...
I'm tired of having the heart I have...
I'm tired of being scared of hurting anyone...
I'm tired of my insomnia...
I'm tired of my brain spinning...
I'm tired of living where I dont wanna live
I'm tired of being where I dont wanna be...
I'm tired of cold...
I'm tired of my past...
I'm tired of this place
I'm tired of this place
I'm tired of this place
I'm tired of not having any energy here...
I'm tired of not being alive here...
I'm tired of missing my muse...
I'm tired of all the money I need to get out of here...
I'm tired of my school...
I'm tired of people telling me what I should do...
I'm tired of idiots...
I'm tired of news...
I'm tired of all the wars in the world...
I'm tired of people who waste their lives...
I'm tired of women who talks about food, clothes, make up and curtains...
I'm tired of this place
I'm tired of this place
I'm tired of this place
I go crazy in here!!!
I'm not alive in here!!!

Karga Bar Kadıköy/Istanbul

Istanbul Istanbul
Let the distance bring us back together!

Getting the bird around....

Messy Angels...

Dancing men...

Weird Angels...

Drinking Angels...

Leaving Time....

Istanbul
Istanbul
heart of my soul
tomorrow
I come home

Dearly Departed

Sweetheart
How I miss your heart
Beating next to mine

The right words
Were always hard to find
When all our time was fine
When darling you were mine, all mine

And I know, I know you had no choice
But I how I miss your voice
Singing right with mine

Flesh of my flesh
Soul of my soul
I come back home

All this darkness, cannot hurt us
Cause they made you from the light
Here on birthplace, don't be nervous
You will make it through, this night

Sweetheart
How I miss your heart
Beating next to mine

Flesh of my flesh
Soul of my soul
I come back home

I'll stop staring at the wall
I'll rise and I will go
with a black hole in my soul
I'll clear my heart in bosphorus

:Angel ene

Stand Paralyzed!

If I could stand beside myself
or I could walk with someone else
like you
like you
.
.
.
.
.
and I will praise you...


:Calla/stand paralyzed

Thank you Jose...
Its So Cold Outside/Polar
For this one and other sounds to ease my sleeping ;)

Give me more time!!!

Elastiktid!!!

özledim seni...
ayrılık yüreğimi karıncalandırıyor nicedir.
beynimi uyuşturuyor özlemin...
çok sık birlikte olmasak bile
benimle olduğunu bilmenin
bunca zamandır içimi ısıttığını
yeni yeni anlıyorum
Yokluğun,
Hatırladıkça yüreğime saplanan bir sizi olmaktan çıkıp
mütemadiyen bir boşluğa
Sabahları seni okşayarak başlamaları
aksamları her isi bir kenara koyup
seninle baş başa konuşmaları özlüyorum;
oynaşmalarımızı,
yürüyüşlerimizi,
sevimli haşarılığını,
çocuksu küskünlüğünü...
Nasılda serttin başkalarına karşı
beni savunurken;
ve ne kadar yumuşak
bir çift kısık gözle kendini
ellerimin okşayışına bırakırken
Gitmeni asla istemediğim halde
buna mecbur olduğunu görmek
ve sana bunları söylemeden
''git artık'' demek
''beni ne kadar çabuk unutursan, o kadar çabuk
kavuşacaksın mutluluğa''
demek sana nede zor
seni görmemek ve belki yıllar sonra
karsılaştığımızda
bana bir yabancı gibi bakmanı istemek senden...
yeni bir sevdayı yasakladığım kalbime söz geçirmek....

Seni Düşünmek
Seni düşünmek güzel şey, ümitli şey,
Dünyanın en güzel sesinden
En güzel şarkıyı dinlemek gibi birşey...
Fakat artık ümit yetmiyor bana,
Ben artık şarkı dinlemek değil,
Şarkı söylemek istiyorum.

Fake a smile, Happy valentines...

Nothing less!
Nothing more!